Oooff, it’s been a couple of hectic weeks and my head is threatening to overload, so I think it’s about that time for me to sit down and have a little talk (or I guess type this post out hahah).
The past few weeks things have really been starting to take off on Youtube and Instagram, in the sense that I am feeling more inspired to create and improve on my craft. At the same time however, I have noticed how the amount of time I spend on my phone has significantly increased. The fact that iPhones now show you how many hours you spend on your phone have made this fact even more confronting. This is mainly due to me not having a lot of physical friends (I stay at home a lot), so my phone is really my gateway to a lot of my friendships. I however started to notice that being on my phone is has started to become an addiction. The unease I feel after not checking my phone for messages every 10 minutes (or less) is frightening and so I realised that it was time for some change and that’s what I started working on last week.
Last year I promised myself that I was going to read this huge stack of self improvement books and I have come to the realisation that whenever I announce that I am planning to read a book it never happens (that’s also why TBRs never work and are embarrassing for me). Either way I took the leap last week and I started reading The Daily Stoic by Ryan Holiday and Stephen Hanselman and So Good They Can’t Ignore You by Cal Newport. Both are very different in the sense that The Daily Stoic is a book meant to be read over the span of a year (on page per day) and really focuses on wisdoms concerning life, whereas Newport’s book researches how you can get a job that you really enjoy a.ka. finding the perfect job. Both are very interesting, but for now I would like to focus more on The Daily Stoic, or at least discuss what I learned from it the past week, to kind of refresh my mind and really internalise the wisdoms.
The first month January focuses on clarity:
‘Control your perceptions.
Direct your actions properly.
Willingly accept what’s outside your control.’
I felt that this quote summed up the first week of January quite well. In a world in which there are so many distractions that are constantly screaming at us for attention, it’s hard to remain focused. Furthermore it is important to recognise that there are so many things that we don’t have control over. How others treat us, if we get that job we wanted or not. What is even more important is that we should realise that despairing over things that you can’t change for an extended period can really do you harm. I am someone who tends to linger of these sort of things and in a sense it has become liberating to consciously decided to not stress/cry over things I can’t change and rather focus my energy on the things I do have control over, and I can tell you it makes me feel incredibly powerful. Realising you are the master of your own future can make such a huge difference and I can’t wait to see what the future has in store :)
Yet again I’m at another turning point in my life. Right now I can’t tell whether it’s for better or worse, or rather it feels absolutely bad, but I believe it is for the best. The most efficient way to describe how I’m feeling would be indifferent yet highly sensitive. and anxious
This month marks the end of what I see as a period filled with a continuous flow of downs. I’m a person who enjoys solitude (to some extent), which can easily leave me isolated for uncomfortable lengths of time. However at the beginning of this period, I met someone who I felt really strongly about. In hindsight I do feel misled to a certain extent and given a false sense of security. This person was in a sense always there, but as an illusional form of support. They were the kind of person that made me want to do better, but concluding I always felt that I never met up to their standard and belittled.
The past month I have been pushed away by them, causing me a lot of anxiety. The moment you realise something is slipping form your grip is when you understand how attached you’ve become. Last weekend they completely shut me out and it has been affecting me greatly. Without a word or respond and it is honestly one of the most painful experience in my life. The question that runs through my mind inexhaustibly is ‘why did this happen?’. I keep going through all of my memories, trying to trace back the mistakes that I might have made to cause this. Nothing comes up, but a feeling of possible insecurity. I will never know why, only that wounds have been cut and that I need to heel.
I managed to get my dream job at a really good company and I have 13 days before I start. Instead of focussing on other people’s needs and trying to make other people happy I’ve decided to focus on and think about myself for once. I deleted WhatsApp, Instagram and Facebook and am going to do whatever I want. I’m going to enjoy life again.
We all know uni can be incredibly stressful. Days running up to exams weeks are the ones were I’m particularly stressed out. I used to cope with the stress by eating every unhealthy thing I could find. Chips, fries, cookies, sweets. You name it, I ate it! In hindsight it wasn’t the smartest thing to do because I always ended up feeling tired, and nauseous. What my body really needed during that time was something healthy, to keep me energised and lately I’ve been trying to give it that.
It’s really though eating healthy without going completely broke haha. Besides, cooking takes up a lot of time, time which we could use to study. So that why I’ll be sharing you some of the tricks I have learned (and still am learning) to stay healthy when you’re low on time and budget.
One of the things I have recently stopped doing is drinking juice and soda, both are complete sugar bombs! I’ve replaced them with water and tea (without sugar). Here’s how I make my favourite fruit infused water for the week :)
What you’ll need:
– a bottle with an infuser (a regular bottle is fine too though)
– a small bowl
– a bunch of fresh mint
– 1 lemon
– 1 lime (optional)
– raspberries (optional)
Slice up the lemon and lime and put them in a bowl to keep in the fridge.
For weeks that it’s going to be really warm outside, put the lime, lemon and raspberry in the freezer. They’ll become little fruit ice cubes and keep your drink cold throughout the day :).
For the next week every morning, put the lemon, mint, lime and raspberries into the infuser and put it back into you water bottle.
And you’re done and ready for a new day! :D