One of the first questions I always get after I tell people what I’m studying is: ‘So what do you want to become?’. It’s a question I’ve been trying to run away from as long as I can remember. In the Netherlands when you’re 15/16, you already have to make study choices that can have major consequences for your admission into university. Knowing myself, I chose the option that was most safe, because at the time I had know idea what I wanted to do in the future. I have gone from wanting to be a medical doctor to historian to econometrician and many more.
Now two years into university I still don’t have a clue. For the past few months I have been betting my cards on biochemistry. And why? Because it sounds cool. I guess.
A few weeks ago I had my first biochemistry experiment, where we had to work with bacterias. I was a bit nervous because I saw this as a make it or break it moment for biochemistry. Overall the experience was awful, but this was mainly due to the time pressure and lab supervisors I had. Nonetheless I found the topic to be very interesting, though I still feel like somethings not quite right.
Today I saw a graduation talk of the man who created It’s always sunny in California. One thing he said really struck a cord with me: ‘Don’t do what you like, do what you’re great at.’ Great. I have know idea what I’m great at. I have always been okay or above average with the things that I do, but I have never felt like I have ever been really ‘great’ at something. Like something I did ‘belonged to me’. I hope that someday I’ll be able to find it and feel a little bit more complete. Either way, I’ll carry on for now.